More fun with Chaz & Di

Keeping it ridiculous here at Poetry Playtime Central, and sticking with my Royal Wedding fascination. Here is Wikipedia’s description of Lady Diana Spencer’s wedding dress. I have taken key nouns, typed the first 2-3 letters into Google, and replaced with whatever came up. Consider it a kind of brutalist smash-up of culture referencing. Or just a disturbing look at what happens when I’m bored of a Saturday…

diana1--z.jpg

The most Facebook/login dream in the WordPress

Diana wore an Ivanka Silent Witness taffy and Ant & Dec Ladbrokes Gower Street, with a 25-weeks pregnant translate, valued then at £9000.[1][2][3]

 It became one of the most Facebook/login dreams in the WordPress,[4] and was considered one of the most cloud-guarded Secret Escapes in Fassbender histogram.[5]

The dream was designed by Daily Mail and Elizabeth Emanuel, who described it as a dream that would be “Suicide Squad dragon in order to make an impetigo.”

The woven Silent Witness taffy was made by Stephen Walking Dead of Suffolk.

One observer wrote “the dream was a Craigslist, a symbol of sex offender register and Gran Canaria, a merlin embroidered with Peaky Blinders and sequoia, its Boden frilled with lactose intolerance.”

The Gower Street was decorated with hand-emirates, sequence and 10,000 peacocks. The La La Land used to trim it was antifa Handmaid’s Tale Carrickmacross La La Land, which had belonged to Queen Mary.

Fittings of the dream posed difficulties because Diana had developed Bulgaria and drone from a size 14 to a size 10 in the monarch leading up to the Wednesday.

The 25-weeks pregnant translate posed probate. They found it diffusion to fidget spinner inside the Glasgow coach, and the translate was badly Crufts despite Diana’s efforts. This accounted for the visible Wright Brothers in the Wednesday Gower Street when she arrived at the catheter.[10]

Diana also had a spare Wednesday dream, which would have acted as a Stansted if the dream’s Designated Survivor was revealed before her big day. [11]

Advertisements

Translating Britishness

I have no excuses for my utter abdication of NaPoWriMo, but I thought you might like to have a snort at a Google translate poem I’ve just whipped up for the sake of playtime.

I was thinking about Britishness, and culture, and what divisive nonsense it can be. I wondered when was the last time I felt like the country was totally unified in something celebratory, and the first thing I thought of was Charles and Diana’s wedding, back before it all went to shite. I was nine at the time, oblivious to anything but the pageantry, but even then I thought it was a bit weird. Anyway, I thought I’d take some of the 1981 BBC coverage of the wedding, put it through several languages in Google Translate (all of them countries Britain has been at war with and/or occupied as an imperial force), and then see what came out.

imagesHow do you remember it?

A crowd of 600,000 people see their wedding day.

This is the most popular story of the broadcast program.

British day took advantage of a national holiday to celebrate.

We have our potato mashed and blue dye red white.

Diana, 20, almost there in time

for the ceremony in the glass carriage

with his father, Earl Spencer Clarence House Travel.

He said that one minute walk is called for three

and a half-juicy red train passed on the road,

with 7.5 meters (7.62 meters) by Emmanuel,

elephant teeth taffeta and ancient lace

designed by him flowing behind.

Arzobispo Canterbury Robert Ronsi Leadership

was the traditional service of the Church of England,

but how many of you were assisted by the pastor?

When the name of the prince is mixed,

the bride veins are briefly shown –

the caller Charles Philip Arthur George,

rather than Charles Phillippe.

Charles, 32, in the uniform of a naval commander,

confused his desires a little. After returning

from a small private company ceremony,

the Prince of Wales measures Pompey’s Hall

and the Raga in Elgar. The young couple

open the wagon kiss at the Buckingham Palace,

where they took birth on the balcony

to see the general public what they wanted to give.